By Jennifer Iannolo

The news is flooded with movements of female empowerment, from toys that celebrate girls being engineers to book clubs that lean in, and each time I encounter one, I come back to the same thought: In order for there to be an enemy or an obstacle, it must first be created and given power.

In order to ensure girls aren’t “left behind”, we might want to look at the context we’ve created surrounding that: How are we contributing to the system that keeps this motor running?

What if there were no “system?"

For someone who grew up as the youngest daughter of a southern Italian father, one might expect that I would have a certain way of viewing my life as a female, or even an expected way of being treated as a subordinate. However, I have a pretty unique context of empowerment, and I’m sure it had a great deal to do with 2 things: (1) the balance provided by my Scottish governess of a mother; and (2) my parents’ outlook as immigrants.

As a first-generation American, I was filled with the hope and inspiration stemming from that special something that compelled them both to leave their countries at 19 and find each other in America. Even though they grew up as ideological enemies — mom under Churchill and dad under Mussolini — they left that behind to create something from scratch.

And therein lies the magic, because there was something absent from their context and conversation: No talk of boys vs. girls or the system of how things were done. So I could simply be me, and was encouraged to dream big, work hard and make my dreams happen. They didn’t see a system, so they didn’t teach it to me.

In fact, I distinctly remember being shocked in 2nd grade that a boy questioned my choice of astronaut as a potential profession. I found it odd to be challenged on such a choice because of my gender — or that anyone had anything to say about it at all. Without a system to constrain me, my life was up to me, from figuring out which university I would attend to whether or not I wanted to get married. Ever.

Now that I have seven nieces at all age ranges, I’m very committed to passing along these same ideals so they can see that there really is nothing standing in their way — only the things they give power to.

One of my nieces is at an age where she has discovered her creative talents. As a student in a performing arts school, she has spent the past couple of years singing, dancing and acting in addition to her regular school work. Now she wants to try her hand at something else to make sure she has a well-rounded experience, and make an informed choice about what to do with her future. Miss Thing is 11.

She’s also a bossy girl like I was, and I think this is a very good thing. I think she’d make a mighty fine CEO one day if she so chooses.

As her auntie, I see it as my job to expose her to the world so she can choose for herself — without anyone else’s opinion. I want to empower her and her cousins to make the decisions that inspire their souls.

So I don???t want them to lean in, fight back, stand up — or to fight at all. I want them to fully express themselves and their passions with nothing in the way — because there are no actual limitations.

And as for Miss Thing, I’m going to keep the way clear for her because when she is President of Planet Earth, I’ll want a good salary as her Chief Minion.

Jennifer Iannolo is the founder of The Gilded Fork™ and Culinary Media Network™, the world’s first all-food podcast channel. She is now the COO at YSN.com, where she empowers ambitious young people from around the world to ignore the system and create the lives of their dreams.

Photo: gsfc via Flickr cc